Top 10 Plants That Look Like a Penis! (Updated)

Mother Nature sure does have a peculiar sense of humor. Some of them are downright hilarious.

That’s about the only way we could explain why there are so many different plants that look like a penis out there in the wild today! We’re not just talking about one or two penis looking plants, either – we are talking about dozens and dozens of them.

In this quick guide below we run through 10 plants you have to stifle a chuckle over if you spotted them out and about.

You’re going to love these!

Also read:

• Plants That Look Like Hair
• Plants That Look Like Corn Dogs
• Plants That Look Like Aloe Vera

10 Plants That Look Like a Penis

1. Eggplant

Perhaps the most “mainstream” of all the different plants that look like a penis on this list, eggplant looks so much like a male member that the emoji for this vegetable has become synonymous with a penis in texting and online.

You don’t have to use too much of your imagination to see a penis when you are staring at an eggplant – even if you are at the grocery store!

This is one of the more particularly phallic looking vegetables, that’s for sure.

2. The Phallus Impudicus

While the eggplant looks a bit like an artist’s interpretation of a penis, the phallus impudicus takes a much more literal approach as a “copycat”.

Easily one of the most common mushrooms found throughout the wooded areas of North America (as well as parts of Europe, too), this fungal growth looks a whole lot like the male member.

We’re not just talking about a “squint a little and you’ll see a passing resemblance”, either. This thing looks like the real deal from the base of the mushroom (a base that looks a lot like testicles) to the shaft of the mushroom all the way up to the top of the mushroom.

It’s a dead ringer.

3. Nepenthes Holdenii

If you ever find yourself wandering around the western parts of Cambodia, particularly at higher elevations (for Cambodia, anyway) you might stumble across more than a few tropical pitcher plants that look a whole lot less like plants and a whole lot like something you’d find in men’s underwear.

One of the rarer plants on this list, it was originally thought that these plants only grew on two peaks in a specific mountain range in western Cambodia. In October 2011, though, a brand-new population of these plants were discovered elsewhere – and in 2014 a crop of these plants were grown from seeds.

Of all the different plants that look like a penis on this list none of them have the same shockingly realistic aesthetic quite the same way that this one does.

The color is pretty close to a human penis. The shape is a dead ringer. And there’s even a system of plant veins that run along the plant that had a little more authenticity.

You might be surprised to learn, though, that this pitcher plant has a lot in common with its faraway cousin the Venus fly trap. Yes, this plant is carnivorous – it eats on insects it lures into its trap (a trap filled with digestive liquids).

4. Peter Pepper

You’re not going to spend a lot of time wondering how Peter Peppers got their name.

Sometimes also going by the nickname of “Chili Willie”, Peter Peppers might be bright red (and sometimes yellow) but they have a look that is very similar to a flaccid penis.

These peppers grow to be anywhere between 4 and 6 inches long and have a decent amount of spice to them, too. They have a medium level of heat compared to other peppers.

You’re probably not going to spot a basket of Peter Peppers at your local grocery store, though. These peppers are a little bit on the rare side of things. They aren’t grown in huge volumes for commercial sales, anyway.

If you would like to grow your own patch of Peter Peppers you can send away for seeds and raise them up on your own. The seeds can be started indoors and then transplanted outside when the weather warms up, allowing them to be grown pretty much anywhere.

5. Phallic Cactus

There are dozens and dozens of different types of cacti that can be described as a phallic cactus, so if you’re hunting for a houseplant that doesn’t require a ton of maintenance to keep happy and healthy – but one that also has a very distinct look to it – this is a good place to start.

The trouble with growing your own phallic cactus is that you never really know exactly how it’s going to look when it has reached full maturity.

Some phallic looking cacti are going to start off looking like a 1:1 carbon copy of the male penis, only to grow into something that looks a lot more like the traditional cactus most of us are familiar with.

Other cacti, though – like the mammillaria meyranii – give you a halfway decent shot at growing a phallic looking cactus without too much hassle, without too much headache, and without too much risk that it looks like a “normal” cactus when finished growing.

6. Stinkhorns

There’s a whole family of fungus out there in the woods around the world called the “phallacea fungal family”, but most folks just called stinkhorns.

Most commonly grown in tropical and subtropical areas, these fungi smell pretty terrible (a big part of how they got their name – no surprise there), send out a sticky mass of spores to reproduce, and have a very distinctly penis looking aesthetic you can spot from quite a ways away.

Some of the fungi in this plant family look more phallic than other ones, but almost all of them have the same basic shape.

You’ll know them when you spot them in the woods.

7. Persian Cucumber

Persian cucumbers might not have the same social cachet that eggplants have right now when it comes to penis looking vegetables, but they aren’t all that far behind.

These kind of cucumbers are, more often than not, on the smaller side of things (at least compared to other cucumbers). We are talking 5 to 6 inches in length and a proportionate girth to them, too.

As far as cucumbers ago, Persian varieties have a milder taste, a lot less water, and a crisp interior that some people really like in salads.

You can also make fantastic pickles out of these vegetables without too much headache or hassle.

8. Huacrapona Palm Trees

At one point in time (especially in the late 1800s) these palm trees or a huge part of the trade and commerce coming out of the Peruvian Amazon.

Tree harvesters would comb the rain forest to hunt down these palm trees (as well as rubber trees), dropping as many of them as they could to all out.

These palm trees don’t look anything at all like the palm trees you might be used to seeing in places like California and Florida (or tropical vacation spots) – but instead look like trees of mail penises just sort of hanging out in the forest.

One of the most interesting things about these trees and the phallic branches that they have is how potent and powerful the oils pulled from these trees can be. The oils can be used to cure malaria, restore and rejuvenate human skin, and even provide sedative and aphrodisiac properties.

Not bad for a tree that looks like this, right?

9. Heliconia Episcopalis

There aren’t a whole lot of herbs on the planet that look like a penis, but this one sure does.

Growing to up to 2 m tall and indigenous to the Amazon rainforest, you’re going to be able to find this penis looking plant in spots like Columbia, Brazil, Ecuador, Peru, and Venezuela.

The flowering part of the herb is the most phallic of the entire plant, with a very distinct shape and structure to it that is difficult to miss. Some of these herbs also have a pinkish kind of hue to them, only adding to the look that helps put this herb on our list of the 10 plants that look like a penis!

10. The Pink Flamingo Flower

The Pink Flamingo flower is native to Colombia and Ecuador and is one of the most sought after by science flowers under the sun.

This flower is so special, in fact, that it’s been given the Royal Horticultural Society’s “Award of Garden Merit” as well as permanent placement on the NASA Clean Air Study list, too.

Both of those distinctions were earned for the phallic looking flowers’ unique ability to remove contaminants like ammonia, formaldehyde, and xylene from the air.

Closing Thoughts

While all of the 10 plants we mentioned above look a lot like a human penis, they are by no means the only plants on the planet that share this odd aesthetic.

As we mentioned earlier, there are literally dozens and dozens of plants all over the world that look like they should have a black sensor bar running across them.

The ones we broke down in this guide, though, are the most phallic looking of the bunch. We are talking about the kinds of plants you might have a tough time identifying as plants in pitch dark environments!

Frequently Asked Questions

Not at all! The shape of these plants may look like human penis but they don’t share much else in common.